CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE

By Corky Carroll

There have been so many great surfers to come and go through all of the over half a century that I have been surfing that I have probably forgotten more than I wish I have.  But there are those, naturally, that have stood out as the best of the best.  The hard part recently has been seeing some of the truly greats overlooked in much of the surfing media.  They do these so called “greatest” surfers lists and they honor the wrong people.  Well, let me take that back.  They don’t honor some of the right people.  One guy who has been overlooked lately who really deserves as much credit as anybody is Mike Doyle. 

Mike Doyle is flat out one of the greatest all around surfers there has ever been.  He was named the “Best Surfer in the World” by the SURFER magazine readers poll two years in a row in 1964 and 65.  He won the Duke Kahanamuko Invitational Big Wave Championship in 1969.  He is in the Surfers Hall of Fame.  Plus he won numerous events here in California both surfing and as a swimmer, paddle board racer, tandem surfer, dory rower and all around “iron man.”  Mike could do it all when it came to surf and ocean related sports.  Actually I should say Mike CAN do it all, he is still doing it.  The dude is in better shape than anybody really should be at his age, which is older than me and I am older than almost everybody.  Not long ago I was surfing with him at a spot near his art gallery in Los Cabos, yes he is a very good artist too.  After we finished surfing he asked if I wanted to go for a paddle.  He had a couple of racing paddleboards.  I was pretty worn out from the mornings surfing session so I said no.  He jumped on one of the boards and took off like he was a Greyhound bus on its way to Barstow or something.’  I was kicked back chowing down on some bacon and eggs, toast and muffins, coffee and some orange juice watching as he disappeared over the horizon.   A few hours later he reappeared and eventually landed on shore in front of where I was busy napping in a comfy hammock. 

“Geeze dude, you were gone a long time.  Where did you go, China?”  I greeted him.

To that he commented that actually he had cut his paddle short because he and some pals had a tee time to play a round of golf that afternoon and he was close to being late.  He took off munching on a fig bar.  The next day he and his beautiful young girlfriend (now wife) Annie took off for the Rockies to go snowboarding.  There had been a big snowfall and they wanted to be on top of it. 

I first met Mike when he picked me up hitchhiking home from a surf session at Doheny one summer day in the early 1960’s.  I was in ga ga awe at actually being in the car of this famous surf god.  He had been a star in many of the early surfing movies and I had seen him winning surfing contests.  We would later become close pals and spent a lot of time surfing together both here and in Hawaii.  Mike was, as I said, a real all around surfer.  He could ride anything.  But it was in big surf that he really excelled.  This guy was truly amazing when it got in the size range that most everybody else turned into total cluckers.  I still have vivid memories of seeing him take off so late on a huge wave at Wiamea Bay one day that he totally free fell down the entire face, probably 30 foot plus by todays size scale, and smoothly landing it and pulling right into the barrel like it was a six foot wave or something.  It was one of those moments where you just shake your head and go “wow.” 

Today Mike is still charging it.  He has a very clean line of surfboards and stand up paddleboards that he designs for the Orange County based Southern Calif Sports Industries, he is a renowned artist who gets tens of thousands of dollars a painting, he is the guy who invented the “mono ski,” which turned into the modern snowboard and the dude who put the “tweak” in the infamous “nose tweak.” 

He is a fantastic guy, a excellent pal and by far one of the greatest surfers ever.  PERIOD.

SURFING ELOQUENCE

By Corky Carroll

Some years ago I did a standup comedy routine for the SURFER magazine television show.  On one of the shows I did a thing on surf terminology that became pretty popular, even leading to one of my words becoming used on a TV sitcom a year or so later.  I have done terminology here before, but I still get requests for it.  So today I have gathered some terms that you might hear if you were hangin’ at the fire ring and begin a little presentation to you on  “da verbiage brah.”

PART ONE:   A to C

AGGRO:   extremely aggressive.  A way of surfing life at the Huntington Beach Pier.

AMPED:   very excited.  Like, she said YES!

BARNYARD:  a place for Barneys.  Also another way to identify a geek, kuk, dweeb, zappofreak or surfnerd.   Any form of humanity that is lesser in the food chain than you.  

BITCHIN’:    something fantastic.  Like, that chick is soooooo bitchin’ lookin’.

BLOW CHUNCKS:  same as Technicolor yawn.  To barf, Ralph, hurl or toss your cookies.

BRODAD:  a dude who overuses the terms “bro” or “Brah.”  

BURNT REYNOLDS:  having got over sunburned.  Like wow dude, you are totally Burnt Reynolds.

CHARGER:  or, to charge.  To totally go for it with wild abandon.  Like wow man, you charged that extreme barrel.  

CHINESE WAX JOB:  getting wax on the bottom of your board.  This happens when you stack ‘em on the car without putting a towel in between. 

CLUCKER:  a chicken or somebody who is afraid.  Like Freddy really clucked on that big set wave.  What a marf.

COFFEE BRICK:  that feeling you get in your stomach when you have had too much coffee before paddling out. 

Like argh!

COOLEO:  someone or something that is cooler than just mere cool.  Like cowabunga dude, that chick is totally cooleo.

CORE:  short for hardcore.  Somebody who will go out in any conditions on any equipment anytime.  This is actually shortened from the original CORE-KY.  

COWABUNGA:  sort of the same thing as “wow!”  Although this can be used in a number of ways depending on the situation.  Like cowabunga dude, gnarly boogie hangin’ from your nose.

CREWBIES:  people that tend to hang out in a group all the time.  Like Mikie won’t go anywhere with his entire crew.  In this situation Mikie would be known as the CREWMASTER.

CRUMBEATER:  this is the dude at the bottom of the food chain.  He is always the one who has to stand in the smoke when at the fire ring.  Like leave all the bogus leftovers for the crumbeater.  

SURF DNA FROM SPACE

By Corky Carroll

The past few days I have been laid up with a nasty winter cold.  Sore throat, stuffed up nose, fever, hacking cough and really feeling horrible.  So I have been stuck here in my bed listening to great waves outside the window whilst settling for watching television and playing chess against the computer.  Playing chess against the computer is really stupid too, you can’t win.  I have been trying to beat a monkey for the last two days and he check mates me in minutes every time.  Not gratifying at all.  Then there are 55 levels to go after you get past that dude. 

But I will admit that I do love watching television.  Call it what you will, but I am a TV. lover all the way.  It’s just that I don’t watch in all day very often.  And there lies the problem.  Daytime TV. is really not what it should be in this day and age.  3476 channels and nothin’s on.  I have seen every NCIS, HOUSE, LAW AND ORDER, CSI, CSI MIAMI, CSI NY, CSI HUNTINGTON BEACH, GILMORE GIRLS, GREYS ANATOMY, BURN NOTICE, SAVING GRACE, BONES and MONK episode that there is, over and over.  I have been getting into CRIMINAL MINDS a little bit lately and like that one.  But this morning there was really nothing at all on that looked good.  I was surfing through the channels when I made the mistake of landing on the History Channel.  There was some show about “Life after People” on.  My beautiful wonder wife, the extremely kool Kika, told me stop there.  She wanted to check it out.  So, against my better judgment, I settled in to watch this lame show on what was going to happen after people wiped each other off the planet.   Examples were given on how that plant called kudzu, that already has eaten a few of the lesser known southern states, would pretty much take over everything.  All the buildings would rot and fall down, dogs and cats would go wild, crocodiles and insects would eat everything and there would be a lot of bats.  They said that in Russia they had been trying to preserve the body of Lennon, but that would soon decay.  I was wondering why John Lennon’s body was in Russia anyway?  He was British. 

Then they said that some rich dude had launched a satellite with the DNA of some smart guy, a comedian and a hot looking fashion model into space.  This was so that just in case some passing aliens came by sometime in the future they could resurrect the human race. 

So, I am thinking, “Why those guys?”  Two guys and a girl?  Where did that come from?  NOT surf city.  This is very very wrong.

I got a better idea.  Let’s launch MY DNA into space along with my really hot looking wife, who also is very funny herself.  Who needs a comedian?  Or a smart guy for that matter, they are mostly geeks, nerds, twits or dweebs anyway.  But, just for good measure, it’s probably a good idea to go ahead and throw in the sexy fashion model too.  Or one of those super hot chick singers I see on the tube.  That would be good.  It really should be “two girls for every boy,” everybody knows that.  This will work good for a number of reasons.  I was not that bad a looking dude many many, a lot of manys, years ago and still have nice pretty blue eyes.  So the kids will be good enough looking.  Also, whose gonna reinvent surfing?  It’s vital to have my kinda DNA for that.  Better an older dude, more historical data stored, more experience etc.  All we need is somebody with enough coin to launch the satellite.  Can you imagine all the perfect uncrowded days there will be while we are working on repopulating the planet?  Whoa!

I tossed out the idea to the extremely kool Kika.  She hit me with a jar of VIC’S and took the remote control and hid it.  Geeze, what’s up with that? 

I really hope I feel good enough to surf tomorrow.

WORDS OF THE SURF SAGES

By Corky Carroll

When I was recently watching the “Eddie” (Eddie Aikau big wave championship) on my laptop I kept thinking about the famous surf quote “Eddie would go!”  In doing so I got the brilliant, as so many of mine seem to consistently be are, idea to put together a list of some of my favorite surf quotes of all time.  Here they are, in no particular order.

“Eddie would go!”  unknown.

“It’s better to be warm than cold.”  Mickey Munoz.

“If it swells, ride it.”  Unknown.

“A big wave is like a beautiful woman, exciting to look at and thrilling to ride.”  Buzzy Trent.

“Live to surf, surf to live.”  Mike Doyle

“Surfing is very much like making love. It always feels good, no matter how many times you’ve done it.”
Paul Strauch.

“Tell the teacher we’re surfin’.”  The Beach Boys.

“Well I’m always working on constantly everything. I never take the approach that I’m doing as well as I possibly can… I always think there’s more and I think if you don’t have that, you are not driven to be better.”
Kelly Slater

“Out of the water, I am nothing.”  Duke Kahanamoku.

“You will never hear surf music again!”  Jimi Hendrix.

“Surfing soothes me, it’s always been a kind of Zen experience for me. The ocean is so magnificent, peaceful, and awesome. The rest of the world disappears for me when I’m on a wave. ”
Paul Walker

“I’ve tried body surfing. It’s NICE.”
Ziggy Marley.

“When the surf gets over 15 feet I seem to want to go eat.”  Leroy Gibbs.

“Surf Music is any music that makes you feel like surfing.”  Jackson Browne.

“Surfing in crowds is like mind over matter.  If I don’t mind it don’t matter.”  Brodus Rogers.

“It’s like the mafia. Once you’re in - your in. There’s no getting out”
Kelly Slater

“Charley don’t surf.”  From the movie Apocalypse Now.

“I could not help concluding this man had the most supreme pleasure while he was driven so fast and so smoothly by the sea.”     Captain James Cook.

“It’s a culmination of your life of surfing when you turn and paddle in (to a wave) at Mavericks.”   Jeff Clark.

“None but natives ever master the art of surf-bathing thoroughly.”  Mark Twain.

“In one place we came upon a large company of naked natives, of both  sexes and all ages, amusing themselves with the national pastime of surf-bathing.  Each heathen would paddle three or four hundred yards out to sea (take a short board with him), then face the shore and wait for a particularly prodigious billow to come along; at the right moment he would fling his board upon its foamy crest and himself upon the board, and here he would come whizzing by like a bombshell!”  Mark Twain.

“Sometimes in the morning, when there is a good surf, I go out there, and I don’t feel it’s a bad world.”  Kary Mullis.

“Then, after I have gotten rid of Batman and Robin for good, I will rule the waves.  Me, the Joker, king of the surf and all the surfers.  Then, Gotham City!  Later, the world!”

The Joker.

“How would you like to stand like a God before the crest of a monster billow, always rushing to the bottom of a hill and never reaching its base, and to come rushing in for a half mile at express speed, in graceful attitude, until you reach the beach and step easily from the wave?”  Duke Kahanamoku.

“Oh give me a home, where the surf chicks all roam, and the whales and the dolphins all play.  Where never is heard a three syllable word, and the waves are eight feet every day.”  Me.  (From the epic hit song “Surf Dogs on the Range.”)

SURF DNA FROM SPACE

By Corky Carroll

The past few days I have been laid up with a nasty winter cold.  Sore throat, stuffed up nose, fever, hacking cough and really feeling horrible.  So I have been stuck here in my bed listening to great waves outside the window whilst settling for watching television and playing chess against the computer.  Playing chess against the computer is really stupid too, you can’t win.  I have been trying to beat a monkey for the last two days and he check mates me in minutes every time.  Not gratifying at all.  Then there are 55 levels to go after you get past that dude. 

But I will admit that I do love watching television.  Call it what you will, but I am a TV. lover all the way.  It’s just that I don’t watch in all day very often.  And there lies the problem.  Daytime TV. is really not what it should be in this day and age.  3476 channels and nothin’s on.  I have seen every NCIS, HOUSE, LAW AND ORDER, CSI, CSI MIAMI, CSI NY, CSI HUNTINGTON BEACH, GILMORE GIRLS, GREYS ANATOMY, BURN NOTICE, SAVING GRACE, BONES and MONK episode that there is, over and over.  I have been getting into CRIMINAL MINDS a little bit lately and like that one.  But this morning there was really nothing at all on that looked good.  I was surfing through the channels when I made the mistake of landing on the History Channel.  There was some show about “Life after People” on.  My beautiful wonder wife, the extremely kool Kika, told me stop there.  She wanted to check it out.  So, against my better judgment, I settled in to watch this lame show on what was going to happen after people wiped each other off the planet.   Examples were given on how that plant called kudzu, that already has eaten a few of the lesser known southern states, would pretty much take over everything.  All the buildings would rot and fall down, dogs and cats would go wild, crocodiles and insects would eat everything and there would be a lot of bats.  They said that in Russia they had been trying to preserve the body of Lennon, but that would soon decay.  I was wondering why John Lennon’s body was in Russia anyway?  He was British. 

Then they said that some rich dude had launched a satellite with the DNA of some smart guy, a comedian and a hot looking fashion model into space.  This was so that just in case some passing aliens came by sometime in the future they could resurrect the human race. 

So, I am thinking, “Why those guys?”  Two guys and a girl?  Where did that come from?  NOT surf city.  This is very very wrong.

I got a better idea.  Let’s launch MY DNA into space along with my really hot looking wife, who also is very funny herself.  Who needs a comedian?  Or a smart guy for that matter, they are mostly geeks, nerds, twits or dweebs anyway.  But, just for good measure, it’s probably a good idea to go ahead and throw in the sexy fashion model too.  Or one of those super hot chick singers I see on the tube.  That would be good.  It really should be “two girls for every boy,” everybody knows that.  This will work good for a number of reasons.  I was not that bad a looking dude many many, a lot of manys, years ago and still have nice pretty blue eyes.  So the kids will be good enough looking.  Also, whose gonna reinvent surfing?  It’s vital to have my kinda DNA for that.  Better an older dude, more historical data stored, more experience etc.  All we need is somebody with enough coin to launch the satellite.  Can you imagine all the perfect uncrowded days there will be while we are working on repopulating the planet?  Whoa!

I tossed out the idea to the extremely kool Kika.  She hit me with a jar of VIC’S and took the remote control and hid it.  Geeze, what’s up with that? 

I really hope I feel good enough to surf tomorrow.

BRETT SIMPSON…READY, SET…GO

By Corky Carroll

This is the time of year that I normally take a look back at the year that just went by as far as the surfing world in our beautiful and wondrous Orange County.  Normally I like to touch on all of the stuff that went on and how it affected us and the surfing world at large.  This year, however, I think that there is one big story that overshadows all the other little ones.  And it’s name is Brett Simpson. 

Brett started out the year as a bright eyed and bushy tailed hot young surfer with a eye to make it into the “big time,” so to speak.  In surfing the major league is the World Championship Tour (WCT) put on by the Association of Surfing Professionals (ASP).  I, personally, have a hard time keeping all the initials straight.  But making it onto the WCT is a huge thing and not something that many local surf pros have seem have been doing in recent years.  In fact, with the blinding exception of the great Tom Curran, you can pretty much safely say that the glory years for California surfers more than less ended with the 1960’s and early 1970’s.  Since then the big time has been pretty much dominated by everybody “but” Californians.   There have been a few exceptions to that here and there, but for the most part I can honestly say that we are in dire need of a new fresh face from here to go forward and represent us with some style.  At least that dude may just have surfaced.

With a solid backing from his sponsor, Orange Counties own ETNIES, Brett began 2009 working his way up the World Qualifying Series (WQS) tour and making a name for himself boldly along the way.  He scored the cover of SURFER magazine in June for their July issue.  Then at the end of July he hit a grand slam home run by winning the U.S. Open of Surfing at his hometown break, the Huntington Beach Pier.  The same week he was named Orange County Surfer of the Year in a ceremony during the Surfing Walk of Fame inductions. 

In September Brett was given the “Breakthrough Surfer of the Year” award at the prestigious SURFER POLL awards dinner.  You can see that this year was going along pretty darn good for our young hero.  Then he was named “Rookie of the Year” for the Hawaiian Triple Crown.  But the goal was to make it to the WCT.  Out of the minors and into the big show.  In December he did just that.  Brett Simpson starts 2010 as a rookie on the big tour. 

What makes this an even better “hometown boy makes good” story is that this is a really good kid.  Not some loud mouthed brat like some of us were.  He is universally well liked by everybody I talk too. 

Speaking to my pal Aston Maxfield at ETNIES, he was telling me that what owner and pro skateboard dude Pierre Senizergues saw in Brett Simpson was a kid with unlimited talent and a personality that he could be proud to back and have represent the company that he had taken to the forefront of the industry.  “We all love Brett here at ETNIES and are so happy to see him come so far so fast, the sky is the limit,” said Maxfield.   

Along with Simpson four other Americans young Americans qualified for the WCT this year.  Tanner and Patrick Gudauskas along with Dusty Payne and Nate Yeomans.  Much of this success can be credited with the excellent coaching down by former pro star Ian Cairns who has been working with Simpson and Yeomans this year.  Cairns as well as Peter Townend are two Aussie born surf stars who came to California and have made huge contributions to our local surfing scene in many ways.  

It is gonna be fun following Brett and the others as they work their way into the rotation on the WCT and climb to the top.  A future World Champion?  It’s possible.  Now that Kelly Slater seems content to let somebody else have that title finally the door is wide open.  And Bret Simpson could be a nice fit for the crown in the near future.   Go Brett.